Chapter 29 : Two Lives of Perspective

“I could feel the difference as if they were two separate lives and feeling very sure that this was my second.”

It had taken eight months but I finally felt back to normal, I was well.

I then realised I felt better than I had done before the operation and throughout all the years previously.  It struck me that for the first time in my life I had a fully functioning heart and I felt incredible!

A lot of things came to me over the following weeks, I realised there had been signs early on, as far back as my teens and twenties, that I had dismissed; how I had never been running at 100% like everybody else because I had no idea of the defect.  I hadn’t known that my heart was working at two thirds of its capacity, what I thought was a normal state of being was not.

My whole life I had been that little bit more tired, felt out of breath from sport and so on, thinking it was all normal and just what everyone else felt, not paying any attention to it. I did like to burn the candle at both ends, living an active life and long working hours, and hadn’t acknowledged that it only added to the tiredness and wasn’t the cause of it.

It was an interesting point to reflect on; I knew how I felt before the operation and how I felt now.

I could feel the difference as if they were two separate lives and feeling very sure that this was my second.

I realised that I had never been in great shape and it was only now having a fully working heart, albeit part cow, that I understood.  In the few years leading up to the operation my health had gradually got worse. I had a strange sense of feeling thin and worn on the inside, as though there wasn’t enough butter scraped over too much bread.

Now I knew why.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s